Unity

When I normally think of teenage girls, I usually wince. I think of cliques, judgement (both on themselves and others), gossip, and general malicious. Who could blame me? The reality is, that is what a lot of high school is: unnecessary cruelty. I remember being in high school, wondering why the 'in-group' girls would just shove past anyone in their way, making cruel comments and dismantling the humanity of others. There were exceptions, there always are, but even within those there was a trace of resentfulness, of suspicion of others. No matter what, I thought, girls in particular are cruel.

That perspective changed a little bit yesterday.

I was alone with all of the high school girls who did not have visitors; there were probably 17-20 of them in this one small room, with just one staff. Not our normal way of doing things, to be sure, but for the most part they were getting along well, split into smaller clumps and talking and laughing, or playing games.

And then a new girl walked in.

She was tiny, nondescript, with huge scared eyes, her shoulder bowed in against her heart, as if to protect it from the heartbreak of exclusion. The talking, the laughter, stilled.

"A new girl!" one cried.

The newcomer hunched smaller into herself.

"You're so pretty!" another called out with a huge smile. "What's your name? We need to introduce ourselves--join us!"

And I watched with joy as she blinked, straightened a little, and hesitantly walked over and sat down at a chair one pulled up for her. Within minutes, she was laughing too.

And when another girl came a few hours later, she received the same eager greeting.

And I learned something.

I learned that unity has nothing to do with history, race, socioeconomic status, appearance, or any other possible separation. Unity is not about being alike, or even agreeing on the same topics. Unity is greeting someone new with a smile, welcoming them in without hesitation, and offering them hope. Unity is a hand to pull you up, no matter who you are. Unity is listening, understanding, patience. Unity is a group of teenagers who all accept each other, who protect each other and support each other, even when that might get them in trouble or may make them stay longer. I have seen so much beauty in this place that many would call ugly, and this is by far the most beautiful thing of all: Acceptance.

We could all stand to learn from teenage girls.